From: "Jessica Thompson" Date: Wed, 20 Nov 2002 18:57:52 +0000 Subject: And the snow still falls Source: direct Title: And the snow still falls Author: JayJay Email: MrsMulder_86@hotmail.com Feedback: will always be replied to! Spoilers: How the ghosts stole Christmas Classification: Story Rating: NC-17, but nothing too graphic Keywords: Post-ep, RST, MSR Summary: Notes: This is my first ever fic which could be rated anything above a PG-13 so go easy on me. I don't in anyway think that this could have happened after HTGSC but I guess that the seasonal mood has just worn me down. December 25, 7.58am We sit in quiet contemplation staring at the millions of tiny white flakes drifting lazily past the slightly steamed up window. Neither of us opens our mouth to speak, both content to merely enjoy the moment and each other's company. We sit like this for a long time; hours it seems, in shy but companionable silence, neither one wanting to break the perfect mood. I had long ago abandoned my boots. I stare at where my dainty stockinged feet rest wearily on the coffee table side by side with my partners. I am fascinated by the way his naked feet dwarf mine, towering a good three inches above them. I glance over at him briefly, studying his profile. Watching him as he dreamily stares out of the window, gazing at the now heavily falling flakes as they elapse swiftly from view. He does not seem to notice my watchful gaze, and after a moment my eyes travel back to our feet. A small smile plays over my lips as I think of him. No matter how much of a pain in the ass my partner can be, he is a true gentleman. My smile widens and turns to a grin as I mentally add, "most of the time" Remembering his little stunt with my car keys a few hours earlier. I can't help but stare at the way he curls his toes every so often. My eyes travel from his feet and move gingerly up his jean clad legs. He must be uncomfortable I think to myself as I notice the way the backs of his calves rest on the edge of the coffee table. Ever the gentleman, he pulled the table far closer to the couch than comfortably accommodates his long legs, merely so that I can rest my tiny feet on the table. Although I passed no comment at the time, I was touched by his actions. I am pulled from my reverie, by his deep voice. "Scully?" he asks without turning to look at me. "It's hard to imagine that every single one of those flakes is different from the rest, isn't it?" I smile and tear my gaze from the coffee table and return it to the window. The snow has begun to build up around the frame, making it look like a scene straight from a Christmas card. I am suddenly overwhelmed with the curiosity to know if it has settled on the ground outside. I stand and carefully cross the room, stopping in front of the desk and crossing my arms over my chest. I gaze outside at the deserted street, cloaked in a thick layer of snow that is glistening even in the winter darkness. Snow amazes me, it always has. I am astounded by the way it can make even the dullest of places look like a thing of unquestionable beauty in a matter of hours. After a moment I can feel him standing behind me, his lean body close but not quite touching mine. Instinctively I lean back slightly, one of my shoulder blades brushing softly against the toned muscles of his chest, telling him that I know he's there. "It's almost unthinkable really," I reply softly. I can hear the enchanted tone in my voice, like a child staring open mouthed at a newly decorated Christmas tree. "They're almost like people aren't they?" I ask. A moment of silence passes between us, before he answers. He reaches up and massages my forearms softly with his strong hands. I freeze slightly at first from his unexpected contact, before relaxing into his feather light touch. "How's that?" he asks, his voice as deep and smooth as velvet. I turn my head slightly over my shoulder to reply, but I keep my eyes trained on the drifting snow outside the window. "There's billions of them, and no two are completely identical," I explain, glancing up at him briefly and smiling. I see something unusual in his eyes. The brown and gold depths sparkle as I gaze into them. "Every last one intricate and complex beyond belief," His pupils are dilated and the corners are drawn up slightly in a secret smile that only I am allowed to share. For the briefest instant I think I see a flash of something else, something I haven't seen since that day in his hallway. Love. I broaden my smile and briefly wonder if my eyes reflect his. I bring up one of my hands and rest it on top of his, which has remained on my arm as I look away. "Each one is completely different from the next, and as unique and beautiful as they are on their own, they can create something so much more breathtaking when they work together." Although I'm nervous I want nothing more than this. Mulder and I... Us. I want there to be an us. I want to be allowed to touch him, to kiss him, and to love him. I've been in love with him for years and although I know that no one can stop me from loving him, I feel as though I have to hide how I feel. Hide it to protect him. But suddenly tonight I don't want to hide from him anymore. Suddenly the consequences of our actions don't seem so high. Suddenly what Mulder and I have now doesn't matter, but what we could have does. I caress the top of his hand slowly and as I do so a tingle of pleasure shoots through my body. And judging from the change in his normally measured breathing, my action has a similar effect on him. As I continue to watch the gently falling snow gather on the ground outside the window he takes a step towards me, pressing his body against mine. He takes my hand in his, and brings it gently to his lips kissing my knuckles affectionately. He then wraps his arms around my waist still keeping hold of my hand. He buries his head into the nape of my neck; his lips brushing against the soft skin behind my ear for just long enough to evoke a small gasp of pleasure from deep within me. My eyes flutter closed involuntarily for an instant. I raise my free hand over my shoulder and rest it on his cheek, the very tips of my fingers roaming in the deep chestnut coloured hair by his ear. He raises his head slightly at my touch and pulls me closer to him; he rests his head on my shoulder and whispers softly into my ear. "Are we like snowflakes Scully?" He nuzzles his cheek against mine "Do you think we could make something as beautiful as that?" I smile, my breathing becoming more rapid at his words. One of his arms moves from around my waist and travels across my stomach and slowly glides down my thigh. His touch is a light a feather as it ventures slowly, almost teasingly across my clothed skin. I can feel the pool of desire mounting between my legs, and feel the evidence of his own arousal pressing gently against my back. I can stand it no longer, and after taking one last glance at the flakes flying around outside the window. I twist around in his arms. Raising my arms and wrapping them around his neck pressing myself against him so closely that I am barely able to breathe. Oxygen, however is the last thing on my mind. His hands rest gently on my lower back, his left tracing tiny circles above his spot. Something he has done so many times. Something that normally feels so familiar suddenly feels anything but. I slowly look him in the eyes allowing my gaze to wander painfully slowly over every curve of his perfect body. I smile at him. "No Mulder," I whisper my voice low and seductive "we could make something so much more beautiful than that." My heart is pounding in my chest so loud that I am sure he must be able to hear it. His eyes are locked with mine. His gorgeous hazel irises are now no more than brown rings around his pupils, which are dark and dilated with lust. I can still see it though. That tiny flash that I saw earlier is back, its beautiful warmth softening his dark eyes beyond belief. The tenderness radiating from his smiling eyes, and for the first time in so many years I feel loved. I can hardly believe what is happening. I stand in his arms and for the first time in years I feel so alive I am unable to control myself. My gaze travels down from his stunning eyes and I glance at his full bottom lip, my mouth opens the tiniest fraction as I contemplate the sensations that kissing him may arouse. My gaze flickers quickly back to his eyes, so large and dazzling that they really are the windows of his soul. I can see what he's feeling, he wants this just as much as I do... but he's also just as nervous. I can feel his large hands that are normally so incredibly strong and sturdy, trembling lightly against my back. Our eyes remain locked as we slowly move towards one another. Not until the final moment do I allow them to flutter closed. Our lips meet, chastely touching, unmoving almost as if both of us are too blissfully content to move. It is Mulder that recovers first. His hands roaming my back and pulling me even tighter against him. Painfully slowly at first he begins to massage my lips with his. For a moment I am unable to do anything except revel in the sensations this kiss is arousing within me. For the first time I can taste him, and he tastes just as I thought he would. His essence is the sweetest cocktail of coffee, mint, and something, which can only be described as Mulder. Almost shyly at first, I return his kiss. Bringing my hands up from the back of his neck, I entwine my fingers in the soft thick hair on the back of his head. I tilt my head up slightly further granting my partner greater access to me. I run my tongue over his full lower lip subtly requesting permission to enter his mouth, immediately he responds opening his perfect mouth and extending his tongue to meet mine. From that moment on time seems to slow down as our tongues dance and play together, teasing and satisfying each other at the same time. The sensation is overwhelming. It feels to me as though Mulder and I are the only two people in existence, and to me at this moment in time we are. It ends all too quickly. After a moment we break way from one another both gasping for breath. He gazes into my eyes and smiles tenderly at me, kissing my forehead gently before drawing his arms up from my lower back and encircling me within them. I nuzzle my head against his chest wrapping my arms around his waist. We stand like this in front of the window for a moment, and we continue to watch the slowly tumbling flakes spill from the sky. There is a peace about us, despite the intimacy of this moment. Something just seems so right, like a cloud has been lifted from over us. We have both waited so long for this that we are too afraid to break the moment, too afraid to continue what we've already started. But it's too late to stop. I revel in the feeling of incredible safety I find in my partners arms for just a moment longer, before proceeding. I close my eyes and deeply breath him in as I place a gentle chaste kiss to his chest. He brings up his hands to rest on my cheeks, lingering softly on every millimetre of my skin it passes as he makes his gentle assent. I shyly raise my gaze to his, not quite ready to take that final step, not quite ready to say the words that I have for so many years longed to say. Not yet ready to say 'I love you'. But as I meet his eyes I know that the words are not necessary. Our silent communication has once again shown me just how well I know this man... and just how well he knows me. The expression on his face and the passion in his eyes speak louder than any words ever could, because in his own little way I know he's saying 'I love you too'. I feel my eyes begin to well up with tears, tears of complete and utter joy. As I stand here firmly held in my partners arms, drowning in the dark and love filled depths of his hazel eyes, I feel more complete than I ever have before. The memory of that day in his hallway floods to me now. That day that we started this, that day we took those first steps towards what is about to happen, that day that our chance was stolen from us. "You've made me a whole person." Those words had touched me in a way that I could not deny, but yet could not bring myself to believe. Today, However, I understand. Mulder fills a void deep within me I did not even know that I had, but I know would be more painful than a gaping wound if it were once again to become empty. Today I cannot deny my love for him, my need for him. My eyes drift closed as he gently moves towards me his lips reaching down to claim me once again. As soon as our lips meet I respond, slowly trying to commit every last contour of his perfect mouth to memory. Our tongues dance together in the same ritual as before, migrating from my mouth to his, almost as though in some form of competition. Some competition where there can be no winners or losers. My hands are roaming his back and chest, revelling in the sensation of the rippling muscles cloaked in soft cotton under my fingertips. His hands are everywhere at once, but yet it is still not enough. I want to feel his fingers roaming over my bare skin. I want to know what it feels like to feel his naked torso pressed tightly against mine. My fingers find themselves to the hem of his stark white tee shirt and I slowly begin to slide it up his chest, my thumbs and palms grazing against his soft, firm skin. Reluctantly our lips part and we both gasp softly for air. He allows me to pull his shirt over his head and drop it gently to the floor. I study his torso slowly, drinking in the sight of him. Allowing my eyes to travel lingeringly over his chest and stomach, which are of course the true definition of perfection. I allow my gaze to slowly wander up lingering over his gorgeous body until I meet his questioning gaze. His eyes lock with mine, his gaze so intense and loving that I can barely stand on my now unsteady legs. He kisses me lightly along my hairline and rests his forehead against mine. For a moment we just stand together trying to steady our breathing before continuing. Again he kisses my forehead, travelling slowly down my face, peppering tender kisses along my hairline, down my cheek making a teasingly slow journey to my neck. His lips lock over my pulse point, kissing, licking and occasionally nipping the skin gently between his teeth. My eyes close involuntarily and I tip back my head bringing my hands up and burying them in his hair. His hands work swiftly on the buttons of my shirt, exposing my flesh slowly but surely. With each touch of my skin my body arches towards him. And before I know it I am standing before him in nothing but my underwear, as his careful gaze commits every curve, every inch of body to his ideic memory. There is no need for words today, and I smile up at him, and take a step away, keeping my eyes locked with his and taking his hand in mine. I reach up slowly kissing his lips chastely one last time before leading my beautiful partner into the bedroom. From the moment we move to the bed, time seems to blur. I am no longer able to think, only feel. Feel the way his warm damp skin moves tenderly against me as we make love. And as I reach my climax, and my world shatters like tiny fragments of glass amid a sea of pleasure I hear my own voice in the distance crying out "I love you." Hours later I wake in his arms, warm and secure. And feeling more loved than I have in years. I feel my partners chest rising steadily and evenly beneath me lost somewhere in a dream world that I cannot share no matter how hard I try. I study his face, as peaceful and contented as I have ever seen it, a slight smile playing on his lips as he slumbers on. I drink in the sight of him, my partner, my love and smile before turning my gaze to the small window over his shoulder. And to my delight the snow still falls. *** End Now if you've been brave enough to read right until the end then let me know what you thought! Feedback to: MrsMulder_86@hotmail.com